Cross Cultural Psyc: Experiencing a Culturally Different Ecology: Rainbow

There is a first time for everything

 

I did not know what kind of feelings I had when I was preparing to visit the lesbian bar.  I was thinking of it as an assignment that I had to do, but did not really want to do.  I was probably a little bit excited because I had never been to a gay bar before.  After walking around for an hour, Leah and I finally found the bar.  When I got to the building and walked up the stairs, I was complaining about how the bar was so hard to find.  The door of the bar was a heavy iron door which people cannot look through as though the bar was a secretive place.  I walked in and saw a bar that was half the size of our psychology classroom, and four people in the bar and I thought to myself “this place is tiny and crap, there is no one here.  This is going to be awkward.”  Sure enough, it was an awkward feeling.  The awkward feeling might have come from the fact that neither Leah nor I know what the appropriate behavior was, we did not know what we should do.  Leah and I sat alone near the window, when all the other people sat around the bar table.  I had this uneasy feeling rising within me, not because I was afraid of being hit on.  I actually thought it would be really cool if I get hit on by a lesbian.  The uneasy feeling came from uncertainties.  I was not sure if I should pretend to be a lesbian or not and how to start a conversation with them.  I did not know what they will think of me if I was heterosexual and what would happen if I lied to them by saying I was a homosexual.  The owner then invited us to sit with the other people and we started chatting with them like we would when we make new friends.  It was the exact feeling I had when I talk to random strangers, except for the guilty feeling I had since I felt that I was “lying” to them.  I felt that I was lying because I was there for a class assignment and I talked to them because I had a class assignment.

These happened in the bar

We talked about how men sometimes never get the message we were sending.  We bashed those nasty men who attempted to sexually abuse us together.  We shared our unpleasant encounters with men and got excited when we all had been in the same situation before.  All a sudden, we bonded through these talks of similar experiences that we had.  There was a girl my age who was interested in me and that made me more confident.  I got more comfortable as we talked and I felt that they were excited to meet someone from a foreign country.  Later on, the owner asked me if I am a lesbian.  I knew that question was coming, but I did not have the answer.  I did not know whether I should lie or not, so I smiled.  I thought she felt I was a bit weird that I smiled.  She asked me why I smiled and I answered her “well, I don’t know how Koreans view lesbians.  It seems like it’s a taboo here”.  This opened up another discussion about different views on homosexuality from different countries, so it turned out to be fine that I smiled.  

Study them

After my interaction with them, I do not think there is much study which needs to be done about homosexuals.  They are just like any other human beings.  In fact, I find them easier to talk to. They are nice, they are friendly, and they are more welcoming and more open-minded than some heterosexuals are.  I think especially because we were all girls, it made it even easier to bond with them.  I find it hard to comprehend why some people think they have mental problems.  I believe if any study is to be done, I would need to develop an understanding of the mind of the people who think homosexuals have “problems”.  I have friends who do not have any homosexual friend at all and have never interacted with a homosexual person, but think that homosexuals have “problems”.  I consider those who think homosexuals have “problems” the ones with real problems.  

Theories

The people who think homosexuals have “problems” probably fit into Hofstede’s Cultural Dimensions- Uncertainty Avoidance.  They feel threatened by the homosexual community because they do not know the community, they developed the belief that “homosexuals have problems” to avoid them.  They are also “separationists” in the Models of Acculturation (Berry, 1990, 1997) who rejects the other culture’s values and beliefs.  Although the model is used for immigrants, I think it can be used here since homosexuality and heterosexuality are two different cultures.  I think I am a “marginalist”, although I do not identify with the homosexual act, but I share similar beliefs with them.  I believe that they should have the same rights heterosexuals enjoy.  

korea: coming to an end

I didn't know that I'm gonna like Korea this much, heheh. After spending a month in Korea, I totally fell in love with this place. Korea's great, Seoul's a lot of fun, I really like Yonsei University's location and the people I met here. I met so many great people and made a lot of new friends. I went to visit one of my new friend's house in Ulsan last weekend :) I went to Mokpo, Daegu and Ulsan to visit my friends the first weekend I was in Korea. It was quite an adventure cuz I don't speak Korean at all. I was using a lot of body language (actually, I'm still using body language) :P 

People here are really nice, very friendly and helpful. But they don't say sorry if they bumped into you or stepped on your toes with their high heels. The hierarchy here is strict. Even if I'm good friends with people older than me, I have to respect them and call them "oppa" (older brother) or "onni" (older sister). When you intro yourself, you're supposed to tell your age too. Women here are not afriad to tell their age, they even ask you to guess how old they are. They care so much about age because they have different ways to speak to older/younger/same age people. With older people, you use the most polite way, and the not as polite way to same age/ younger people. I'm kinda glad that I'm a foreinger cuz it's not that big of a deal if I screw up since my friends know that I'm not a Korean. Elderly people are highly respected, no one ever sits in the "reserved for old people seats" on buses and subways even when there is no old people around.

I went to JimJilBang and Karaoke and I went to Everland. I go shopping a lot. Warning for girls: girls who are coming to Korea that they need to bring their best clothes and high heels, or tell them not to bring any clothes with them and buy new ones here. Korean girls dress really nicely. Clothes that American girls go clubbing with (NOT the "hi, look at my boobs" ones) are they clothes Korean girls wear to school. I think girls here wake up 5 hours before class to put on their make up and do their hair. 

Korea's fun BUT I have to complain about the YISS program.

The professors they hired for the summer program kind of sucks a lot. I won't complain about that cuz there are bad professors in every uni. BUT seriously, can't you spend a little more money to invite better professors? The average for my Macroecon midterm was 54% (without a curve), which means the majority of the class failed the midterm. If it a few people failed, then it's the students' problem; if most of the students' failed, it's the professor's problem! I've never taken a more boring class than my Macroecon class right now. It's sad that I have to deal with a crappy professor in the summer. 

International House is really old and the bathroom stinks and the showers flood and the A/C blows out smelly air. And there are so many bugs in the room! Construction right beside I-House starts from 7am every single day, including Sunday! They said that they'll try to reduce the noise. Reduce 他的頭! They were drilling the floor this one day and my bed started shaking, it was 7am on a weekend! WTF?! On the website, it says that there will be 5 extra curricular activities on Friday that we can choose from, we ended up only having 2 extra curricular activities (Hip Hop and Taekwondo). What the heck?! I wanted to take Bojagi Making. And about the field trips: since they're not having a lot of extra curricular, shouldn't they let more students join the field trips instead of just having 90 seats/ field trip?! How many people are in the YISS program? Like at least 300? 90 seats isn't even enough for 1/2 of the students here! Grrrrr...... 

I wish there's no final exam and I'm not taking 3 classes, so I can enjoy Korea more.

Korean guys are hot! i think im starting to like guys with single eyelid. this guy i met in church is totally the type i like! he's kinda 8 yrs older than me tho.... and my friends here say that he looks like "ajussi"

Letters to home from Korea

Hi,

 

I'm already in the International House in Yonsei University. I got here at 6pm. Everything's settled, I made a few new friends and went out to dinner with them.This is my Korea cell phone number: (82) 010-8659-797401. I have friend in Korea (Christie Fox: 010-3218-4122) and I'm going to hang out with her tomorrow. We will go to Ulsan, then we will go to Daegu.

Korea's fashion is so different from Hong Kong/ Taiwan/ America. Women here all wear heels and they seem to have the super power to walk 50 miles with their heels on the entire day. Incheon and Seoul both look kind of like Taipei, except everything here looks newer. A lot of people here thought that I am Korea. They will start speaking to me in Korean, then I will quickly tell them in English "no Korea". It's hard getting around, because people here don't speak very good English and I don't speak Korean. 

<3, Ya-Ya

Hi,

Today is the first day of class. I'm taking 3 classes Monday to Thursday from 9am - 3:40pm: Macroeconomics, Cross Culture Psychology and Marketing. Macroeconomics is the most boring class, the professor is from Bates College and has no idea how to lecture. Cross Culture Psychology is so far the best. The professor is Japanese but he teaches in UCLA. Marketing's professor went to my college for his master and PhD degrees. I didn't get to meet him today because he was in a conference. I met a lot of people from my school, but are not living in the International House.

Last weekend, I went to Ulsan, Daegu and Mokpo to visit my friend Christie who is teaching ENglish here in Korea. I went to Norebang (karaoke), stayed in a Jimjilbang for a night (a very Korean style hotel), and stayed with Christie (my friend)'s host family for 2 days. I met a lot of her friends who are also teaching English in Korea. I also went to visit the school she's primary school she is teaching in. The kids are all very nice and shy. They were all very excited to see me (a new face in the school). It was a fun weekend.

Alright, that's it for this week. Take care.

Love,
Ya-Ya

Korea Day 1

今天第一天到韩国。那个过关的脸跟我讲话都没有，就让我过了。那完行李后我就去拿我在网上预定的手迹。那个counter的人听不懂我在说什么，害 我要花1000won上网给她看我的预约。不过后来他送了我一支牙膏做补偿，服务还不错。手机拿到后我就去搭公车，转taxi到学校。都还蛮顺利的。
韩国人好像觉得我长得很像韩国人，他们都一子跟我将韩文。啊我听不懂，所以每次都很紧张的高树它们我不会韩文。